Judges should be gentlemen, we have appointed the Right Honourable Isaac Bickerstaff our Chief Justice, to succeed to the seat which his illustrious namesake and ancestor once filled; and have, in consideration of his manners, merits, and descent, raised the said Isaac to the dignity of the peerage, in our ideal realms, by the style and title of Baron Lanesheer* of Punctilio, in the county of Nameless. And we have also, in cónsideration of the like pretensions, appointed Edward Preux, Samuel Sensitive, and Frederick Ballance, his brethren of the bench, and have conferred on the three lastmentioned persons the honour of knighthood; which we have likewise bestowed on Charles Cartel and Francis Hairsplit, our honorary Attorney and Solicitor General; and upon James Slandercrush, whom we have nominated permanent Sheriff of our Honour of Decorum. Which said Isaac Lord Baron Lanesheer, Sir Edward Preux, Sir Samuel Sensitive, and Sir Frederick Ballance, Knights, we have constituted and appointed to have cognizance of all matters of Honour, Feeling, Menu- Devoir, and Petite Morale; and to hear, examine, discuss and determine, all and singular Trahisons, Fame-slaugh-`

* See the Tatler, passim.

This cannot be a synanonyme of Galway; which is a county, lying not within the dominions of the Anonymous; but within those of our Sovereign Lord King George the third.

ters, Heart-burnings, Name-pilferings, Pride-woundings, Dishonours, Ingratitudes, Contempts, Disgraces, Shunnings, Coldnesses, Unkindnesses, Cuttings, Distances, Backturnings, Underminings, Cajolings, Adulations, Flatteries, and Cabals; all Arrogance, Insults, Sarcasms, Sneers, Jeers, Derisons, Quizzings, Superciliousnesses, Nose-suspendings, Disparagements, Scoffings, Mockeries, and Affronts; all Brutalities, Rudenesses, Boisterousnesses, Overbearings, Brusqueries, Brawls, Scoldings, Incivilities, Too-civilities, and Fawnings; all Jealousies, Captiousnesses, Misgivings, Suspicions, Frettings, Peevishness, Sensibilities, Sorenesses, and Whinings; all Indelicacies, Vulgarities, Polissonneries, Poltronneries, Ill-breedings, Oppressions, Wiles, Offences, Evil-doings, and Causes whatsoever, by whomsoever done, committed, or perpetrated, or hereafter to be done, committed, or perpetrated within our literary province, as well against the peace of Society, and common law of Humanity, as against the form and effect of any Statutes, Ordinances, Provisions, or Regulations in that behalf made, for the promotion of Benevolence, and preservation of Decorum. And we hereby invest our said Justices with a civil as well as criminal jurisdiction; appointing them our Commissioners in our aforesaid province, as well within fashionable liberties as without, to hold plea of all Personalities, and redress all Suitors, who shew themselves aggrieved, by Incivilities, Breaches of

Decorum, Violation of the Minor Duties, or other malicious, ill-natured, or unbecoming conduct; doing full and speedy* justice to all parties, according to the laws of Honour, and customs of Literature. And we further authorize and empower our said Commissioners, on the Crown side, to inflict on persons legally convicted, judicio Parium, such punishment and disgrace as Propriety will allow, and to justice shall appertain; and from time to time, as often as need shall be, to deliver our Metropolis and Realm aforesaid, of all Offenders and Trespassers therein; hereby giving our said Commissioners jurisdiction, in all cases of the above description, which lie beyond the cognizance and animadversion of the Courts of Law. We therefore command our said Justices diligently to attend the premises, and execute these things with effect. We also command all and singular Printers, Booksellers, Writers, Rea-, ders, and other our Liege Subjects of our literary Realms, that to our said Commissioners, in the execution of the premises, they be obedient, aiding and assisting, as becometh. GIVEN at our Court at

*It was said of Fabius that, cunctando restituit rem. This is a mode of restitution, (i. e. restitution of Rights, attended with delay,) well known to the law (and equity) of these Islands. It was rumoured that, some time before he quitted Ireland, one of our Chancellors had thoughts of adopting this motto. But as the Chancery arrear did not, in his Lordship's time, exceed 400 causes, I never, for my part, gave credit to the report.

Whoknows where, the 19th day of December, in the

first year of our Reign.

Vivat Rex.

The same timidity, with an avowal of which I introduced the "Arrangement," in No. XXVI. prevents my naming the reputed Author of the following JEUX D'ESPRIT.

Jack wishes for a Knight's degree;

(For Jack, of late, is grown ambitious :)
What, think you, should his title be,

When dubb'd?-Sir John-or Sir Reptitious?

Tyre and Sidon.*

Bess vows she will not cease to weep;

But Bess is not to be relied on:

She never can this promise keep,
As long as Tire is nigh to Sigh'd-on.

A peck of salt, old proverbs tell,

To know your man, you needs must eat :
Be added-would you know him well,

You never ought to corn your meat.

*To the copy of these lines which is in my possession, the following Memorandum is annexed. "These quibbling lines were produced by a challenge to write an epigram on the first

Thy mind, of every talent void,

And bare, how bare! of information,
Whence is the wordy foam supplied,
That stuns and deluges the nation?

O curious paradox of Dulness!
Reverse of Denham's wish so glowing:
Not without overflowing, fulness:
But without fulness, overflowing !*

LAUS FERRI.

Militi, Agricolæ, Navitæ,

Arma, Aratra, Index magneticus;
Acies, Segetes, Commercia;

Gloria, Copia, Humanitas.†

word which, on opening a book, should meet the challenger's eye. The first word happened to be Tyre."

* To this copy also, the note which follows is annexed. "The same idea, nearly, may be met with in a work of Pope; which the author of these lines, when he wrote them, (in 1792) did not know; or had forgotten."

The Epigram contains a third stanza; which, though not without its merit, is objectionable on this ground, that it seems to follow the point-in which every epigram ought to terminate. I have therefore taken the liberty of retrenching this supplemental stanza; which however I here insert.

Proceed then, with eternal din,

Dark, empty, deafening, vain, remorseless:
Since, wond'rous! it could once begin,

Why should a torrent cease—that's sourceless?

+ All who have treated the subject, seem to agree, in repre,