strength sufficient to go to Church, yet he almost resolved not to go at all: when he did go, the prayers and sacrament were a grievous burden to him; instead of a fruitful field, he found the whole service a dreary barren wilderness, destitute of comfort and profit. He felt what he calls, "A cowardly desire of death," to escape from his present painful feelings. He began to examine himself, and to enquire wherein his present state differed from the state he was in before he professed faith. He soon found there was a difference in the following particulars: he observed the present darkness was not like the former; there was no guilt in it; he was persuaded God would remove it in his own time; and he was confident of the love and mercy of God to him in Christ Jesus.-The former state was night, the present only a cloudy day; at length the cloud dispersed, and the Sun of righteousness again shone with brightness on his soul.

This was a most instructive exercise. It shewed him, 1. His own utter helplessness in the work of his salvation. He found by experience that he could not produce comfort, or any religious affection in himself when he most wanted them. The work is God's; when he gives light and strength, man may work, and he is required to work out his salvation with fear and trembling; but till God begins the work, man cannot move a step in it. 2. It taught him to value the gifts of God which nothing can purchase; and to guard them as his treasure, and not barter them for the goods of this life. 3. He saw thereby, that if he could not produce comfort and religious affections in himself, he was still less able to produce them in others, and therefore, whenever they were experienced under his ministry, the work was God's, he was only the mean

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humble instrument in his hand. Thus God prepared him for great usefulness and guarded him against pride. When the trial was over, he saw the excellent fruits of it, and thanked God that it continued so long.

June the 7th, Dr. Byrom* called upon him. Mr. Wesley had a hard struggle with his bashfulness before he could prevail on himself to speak freely to the Doctor on the things of God. At length he gave him a simple relation of his own experience: this brought on a full explanation of the doctrine of faith, which Dr. Byrom received with wonderful readiness.

Mr. Wesley having recovered strength, began to move about among his friends. He went to Blendon, and to some other places in the country, and found, that the more he laboured in the work of the ministry, the more his joy and happiness in God was increased. He was remarkably diligent, zealous, and successful wherever he went, seldom staying above a night or two in any place, but several persons were convinced of the truth and converted to God. In this journey he met with the Rev. Mr. Piers, and on the 9th of this month,

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* John Byrom, an ingenious poet of Manchester, was born in 1691. His first poetical Essay appeared in the Spectator, No. 603, beginning "My time, O ye Muses, was happily spent ;" which with two humour. ous letters on dreams, are to be found in the eighth Volume. He was admitted a Member of the Royal Society in 1724. Having originally entertained thoughts of practicing Physic, he received the appellation of Doctor by which he was always known; but reducing himself to narrow circumstances by a precipitate marriage, he supported himself by teaching a new method of writing Short-Hand, of his own invention; until an estate devolved to him by the death of an elder brother. He was a man of a ready lively wit, of which he gave many humourous specimens, whenever a favourable opportunity tempted him to indulge his disposition. He died in 1763; and a collection of his 'Miscellaneous Poems was printed at Manchester, in two Volumes, Octavo, 1773.

in riding to Bexley, spake to him of his own experience, with great simplicity, but with confidence.-He found Mr. Piers ready to receive the faith-Greatest part of the day was spent in the same manner; Mr. Bray, who was with Mr. Wesley, relating the dealings of God with his own soul, and shewing what great things God had done for their friends in London. Mr. Piers listened with eager attention to all that was said, made not the least objection, but confessed that these were things which he had never experienced. They walked, and sung, and prayed in the garden: he was greatly affected, and testified his full conviction of the truth, and desire of finding Christ. "But, (said he,) I must "first prepare myself by long exercise of prayer and "good works."

The day before Mr. Wesley and Mr. Bray arrived at Blendon, Mr. Piers had been led to read the Homily on justification, by which he was convinced that in him, by nature, dwelt no good thing. This prepared him to receive what these messengers of peace related, concerning their own experience. He now saw that all the thoughts of his heart were evil, and that continually, forasmuch as whatsoever is not of faith is sin.

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June the 10th, He became earnest for present salvation he prayed to God for comfort, and was encouraged by reading Luke v. 23: "Whether is it easier to say, thy sins be forgiven thee, or to say, rise

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up and walk? But that ye may know that the Son "of Man hath power on earth to forgive sins, (he said "unto the sick of the palsy) I say unto thee arise, and "take up thy bed, and go unto thine house," &c. Mr. Wesley and Mr. Bray now conversed with him on the power of Christ to save, and then prayed with him; they afterwards read the 65th Psalm, and all of them

were

were animated with hope in reading, "Thou that hearest 66 prayer, unto thee shall all flesh come. Blessed is the

man whom thou choosest, and receivest unto thyself; " he shall dwell in thy court, and shall be satisfied with "the plenteousness of thy house, even of thy holy "temple. Thou shalt shew us wonderful things in thy " righteousness, O God of our salvation! Thou art the 66 hope of all the ends of the earth," &c. In the continuance of these exercises alternately, of conversing, reading, and praying together, Mr. Piers received power to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and had peace and joy in believing.

The next day Mr. Piers preached on death; and in hearing him, Mr. Wesley observes, "I found great "joy in feeling myself willing, or rather desirous to "die."-This however did not proceed from impatience, or a fear of the afflictions and sufferings of life, but from a clear evidence of his acceptance in the Beloved. After sermon they went to the house of Mr. Piers, and joined in prayer for a poor woman in deep despair : then going down to her, Mr. Wesley asked whether she thought God was love, and not anger, as Satan would persuade her; he shewed her the gospel plan of salvation; a plan founded in mercy and love to lost perishing sinners. She received what he said with all imaginable eagerness. When they had continued some time together in prayer for her, she rose up a new creature, strongly and explicitly declaring her faith in the blood of Christ, and full persuasion that she was accepted in him.

Mr. Wesley remained weak in body, but grew stronger daily in faith, and more zealous for God and the salvation of men, great power accompanying his exhortations and prayers. On the evening of this day, after family prayer, he expounded the Lesson, and one

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of the servants testified her faith in Christ, and peace with God. A short time afterwards the gardener was made a happy partaker of the same blessings. Mr. Piers also began to see the fruit of his ministerial labours. Being sent for to visit a dying woman in despair, because she had done so little good, and so much evil; he declared to her the glad tidings of salvation by grace, and shewed her, that if she could sincerely repent and receive Christ by a living faith, God would pardon her sins and receive her graciously. This opened to her view a solid ground of comfort; she gladly quitted all confidence in herself, to trust in Jesus Christ, and she expressed her faith in him by a calm, cheerful, triumphant expectation of death. Her fears and agonies were at an end; being justified by faith she had peace with God, and only entered farther into her rest, by dying a few hours after, The spectators of this awful joyful scene, were melted into tears, while she calmly passed into the heavenly Canaan, and brought up a good report of her faithful Pastor, who under Christ saved her soul from death.

The next day, June the 14th, Mr. Wesley returned to London, and was informed that his brother, Mr. John Wesley was gone to Hernhuth. The news, he observes, surprized, but did not disquiet him. He staid only two days in London, and then returned with J. Delamotte to Blendon, and from thence to Bexley. Here his complaints returned upon him, and he was obliged to keep his bed. "Desires of death, (says he) "often rose in me, which I laboured to check, not daring to form any wish concerning it." His pains abated; and on the 21st, we find him complaining, that several days had elapsed and he had done nothing for God; so earnestly did he desire to be incessantly labouring in the work of the ministry.

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