THE

For FEBRUARY 1794.

The EXPERIENCE and TRAVELS of Mr. FREEBORN GARRETSON, Minifter of the Gofpel, in North America.

[Continued from page 9.]

N the evening in which I found peace with GOD, I was fo exceeding happy, that when I lay down to reft at midnight, I fcarcely wished for fleep. However at length I clofed my eyes, and when I awoke about break of day, the enemy fuggefted, "Where is your religion now ?" Í ftarted from my pillow, and recollecting the time and place where I received the bleffing, was enabled to repel the temptation. The enemy then infinuated, that, "it was all a delufion;" and as I did not feel fo much happinefs as I had done, I began to entertain perplexing doubts and fears, till my foul was involved in great diftrefs. I retired into the fields and woods, and frequently bowed my knees before the LORD; and he graciously condefcended to manifeft himself again to my foul, in a powerful manner. At the fame time, it was ftrongly impreffed upon my mind to go to a certain place, and de clare to all who might be there, the great things which the LORD had done for me. When I came to the place, I found a Methodist Preacher, and feveral of my acquaintance there; but although I had a great defire to deliver my meffage, yet I ftaggered at the crols, whereby I grieved the Holy Spirit and returned home in deep diftrefs.

For fome days I was continually harraffed by the Enemy. I fafted and prayed till I was almoft reduced to a skeleton, but did not open my lips to any one. I began to fink into defpair. Although all nature was clothed with beauty and verdure, yet I could difcover no charms in any thing around me. I was overwhelmed with floods of atheistical and deisti. cal thoughts. The Adverfary fuggefted, "Where is your "GUD now? You fee you have been deluded. If you "will take my advice, you will deny every pretenfion to this XVII Feb. 1794.

religion,

religion. The Methodifts are a fet of enthufiafts, and you "have now a full proof of it." At the fame time he prefented to my imagination, the World in all its pomp and glory; adding, "And all thefe things will I give you, if

66

you will deny that GOD, you have been attempting to "ferve, and pray to him no more." My foul was compaffed round with dreadful darknefs, and penetrated with fevere anguish and diftrefs. I was afraid my lips would be forced open to deny the GOD who made me. But glory be to his Name, he mercifully looked upon my affliction; he opened Eternity to my view; and gave me fuch a discovery of his tremendous Majefty, that I funk into the dust before him, and proftrated my face to the ground, crying out, LORD, if I perish, it fhall be at thy feet, imploring Mercy!" Here I lay till a gleam of hope fprung up in my foul, that I fhould be faved at laft.

66

When I arose from the ground, I came to this determination, that I would exclude myself from human society, and live in a cell upon bread and water, mourning out my days, for having grieved the LORD. Next day, being the Sabbath, I did not intend to go to any place of worship, nor defired to fee any perfon, but wifhed to spend the day in folitude. I continued to read the Bible till eight o'clock, and then, under a fenfe of duty, called the family together for prayer. While I was giving out a hymn, this thought powerfully ftruck my mind," It is not right for you to keep your "It "Fellow-Creatures in Bondage! You must let the oppressed go 'free." I knew this was the voice of the LORD. Till this moment, I never fufpected that the practice of Slave-keeping was wrong; having neither read any thing on the fubject; nor converfed with perfons refpecting its finfulness. After a minute's paufe, I replied, "Lok D, the oppreffed fhall go free." I then addreffed the Slaves, and told them, "You do not belong to me: I will not defire your fervice without makeing you a fufficient compenfation." I now found liberty to proceed in family worship. After finging, I kneeled down to pray. But if I had the tongue of an Angel, I could never fully defcribe what I felt. All that dejection and me. lancholy gloom, which I had groaned under, vanished away in a moment. A divine sweetness ran through my whole frame. My foul was admitted into the depths of the Redeemer's Love, in an inexpreffible manner! Praife and Glory be to his Name for ever!

46

66

I had now no defire to confine myfelf to a cell; but wifhed to fpread my Redeemer's glory to the ends of the World. I blefs the LORD for bringing me fafe through fuch fiery trials. My late affliction of mind was for my good. It was GOD,

and

and not man, that taught me the impropriety of holding flaves and I fhall never be able to praise him enough for it. My very heart bleeds for Slave-holders; efpecially those who make a profeffion of Religion. In the forenoon I at

tended the Church, but could not find what I wanted. In the afternoon I went to hear the Methodists, and was fully perfuaded, that they were the people of GOD. I was fo happy in the time of preaching, that I could conceal it no longer. I therefore determined to chufe God's people, for my people; and returned home rejoicing.

A few days after, I attended, for the first time, a Classmeeting, at Deer-creek: I was convinced it was a prudential inftitution, and my heart was more than ever united to this community. I now began to be preffed in fpirit, to vifit my friends and neighbours; efpecially fome particular families, that lay with weight upon my mind. The firft vifit I made, the man of the house was much enraged against me: however, the LORD was pleased to convert one or two of his children. In another house, about twenty miles off, I declared what the LORD had done for my foul, and defired the mafter to fend, and call in his neighbours, and I would pray with them. When the people got together, I gave them an exhortation, and the LORD fent his arrows of conviction to the hearts of three finners, one of whom followed me fifteen miles the next day.

Be

The next time I attended Clafs-meeting, being informed, that fome were afraid I was come to fpy out their liberties, I ftood up and declared what the LORD had done for me. A divine fire, was kindled in every heart, and we had a bleffed meeting; and I returned home praifing GoD. ing upon a vifit to my brother, whom the LORD had wonderfully raifed up from the jaws of Death, while I was fpeaking to about forty perfons, the power of GOD defcended upon us all. Near one half of the congregation were ftruck to the ground, and cried for mercy, fo loud, as to be heard at a great distance. Next morning, a neighbouring gentleman came to the house to beat me. He fwore, I fhould fpoil all his Negroes. I told him, if he did not leave off fwearing, he would fend his own foul to Hell. This highly enraged him, and he ftruck me feveral times. Through the bleffing of GoD, my mind was perfectly calm, and I was fo happy, that I fcarce felt his blows. I continued fpeaking to him till he was as quiet as a lamb; and he, and his man, bidding us a good morning, went peaceably away. Not long after, he was taken into an awful Eternity.

I now began to hold evening meetings in different places, feveral times in a week; and united thofe who were awakened

H 2

into

into a kind of fociety; feveral of whom, I truft, where hap pily united to Jefus. Frequently we continued in prayer and praife till after midnight. Many of my relations were forry for me. But, glory be to GOD, I delighted in the cross of my Saviour. I had many inward conflicts with Satan, and the corruptions of my own heart; but the Grace of Chrift was fufficient for me.

Having an appointment one LORD's-day, before I got to the place, a company of rude perfons were affembled together, to prevent the meeting. But through divine affistance, I was enabled to speak boldly; and although they raged, and threatened me, yet my faith was fo ftrong, that I was perfuaded they could not hurt me. It was a day of rejoicing to my foul. O may I always give the glory to my great Deliverer!

I was determined to have nothing to do with the War. It was contrary to my mind, and grievous to my confcience, to have any hand in hedding human blood. This brought me into fome trouble. I was taken before the Rulers at the general Meeting. But the LORD was with me, and gave me words, which my oppofers could not refift. I was fo happy, even when furrounded by my enemies, that with tears flowing from my eyes, I told them of their danger, and intreated them to turn to the LORD. They laid a fine upon me, but were not permitted to take a farthing of my property. On being difmiffed I withdrew, and found great free. dom to pray for them; I returned home with a glad heart.

66

Mr. W, the minifter of our parish, had been the inftru. ment, for a long time, in keeping me from GOD, and his people; I had a great defire to have fome converfation with him, and accordingly met him in the Veftry-chamber, before the Veftry, where I told him what God had done for my foul. He answered me, by afking, "Who gave you authority "to keep meetings in my parish?" and added, "You have no right to do it, unless you are ordained ! I replied, "The Love of Chrift conftraineth me; I do it not for mo ney, or honour and while there are finners in your parish, "I fhall endeavour to call them to repentance; for having "tafted of the LORD's Goodness, I have a longing defire that "all my neighbours fhould likewife be happy.' We con. tinued in converfation near two hours, and I then withdrew, after telling him, in a plain manner, what I thought of his Doctrine, and the effect it formerly had upon me,

66

Being at this time but young in the ways of Religion, and meeting with many to weaken my hands, and but few to strengthen and encourage me, I was forely tempted to give up my confidence in the LORD. But in the time of tempta

tion I applied to my never-failing Friend, and wrestled in fervent prayer, till he graciously anfwered, "Fear not, I am "with thee, and will fupport thee under all thy trials." The ftreams of divine confolation overflowed my heart : I felt ftrength from above; and was enabled to go on my way rejoicing.

Mr. T. R. being informed, that I was under great exercifes with regard to the work of the miniftry, defired me to meet him at a friend's houfe. And although he was a stranger to me, yet I found in him a Father; his advice was fea fonable and falutary, for I had been wading through deep waters. Soon after my acquaintance with Mr. R-, and at his request I travelled with him a fhort time. myfelf happy at times, and had freedom to fpeak; though the crofs feemed very heavy, and I was often ready to

fart back.

I found

After my return home, I fell into great temptations, and concluded it would not do, to commence a Travelling Preacher. The enemy infinuated, that the only way to prevent it was to alter my condition; and a fuitable object was prefented before me. I took fome fleps in this affair, but was prevented from proceeding in it, by a clear conviction that I was going to do my own Will, in oppofition to the Will of GOD, who called me to go out and preach the Gofpel. Mr. R—, defired me to meet him at Baltimore; when I came there, he forced me into the pulpit; but my temptations were fo great, that I could fcarcely fupport myfelf under them. However, the LORD opened my mouth, and I found it a precious time both to myself and others.

After I had travelled with Mr. R. a few days, he fent me into a Circuit alone. This was the Autumn after my converfion. The LORD was with me, and the Word was bleffed to many fouls. Here I might have been truly happy, if I had guarded against the Adverfary; but liftening to his fuggeftions, I concluded that I was not called to the work, and at the end of fifteen days, I returned home under deep dejection. For four months my time was chiefly spent in prayer, reading, and religious exercises. It was not uncommon for me to preach in my fleep. One night it seemed as if the whole world of finners were prefented to my view, fufpended in the air by a fingle thread, and hanging over the horrible pit. I faw they were polluted with all kinds of ungodly practices, and perfectly careless and unapprehensive of the danger beneath them. In my fleep I began to cry aloud. to them, in order to apprife them of their dreadful danger. When I awoke, I was fitting up in bed, trembling, and as wet with fweat, as if I had been dipped in a river.

Although